Sunday, 20 April 2008

just because you're paranoid

I put off going to IKEA for years, because I figured I wasn't the sort of person who needed IKEA in her life.

When I finally did, I had a bit of a panic attack. OK, make that a major panic attack. All that maze of twisty little passages, all alike stuff.

Time passes, and I learn to live with IKEA furniture and try to have some of their meatballs in the freezer comaprtment for whenever.

I was in there a couple of years back with my then-flatmate Barbara, who was a bit of a Serious Shopper. She had a notepad with measurements in it, and took a tape measure along. You know the sort. We were there at quite a late hour of the evening, for shopping.

I looked around. There were loads of people, mostly couples, earnestly consulting notes and wielding tape measures.

"Who'd have thought we'd become the sort of people who shop at IKEA?" I remarked to Barbara.

"I am NOT the sort of person who shops at IKEA," she replied with all the huffiness that a former colonial administrator's daughter could muster.


Katie and I went bimbling down IKEAwards yesterday, because we wanted a picture frame for one of her works.

There was a scary amount of traffic everywhere, and loads of policemen all over the place.

Paranoia kicks in. If the balloon ever goes up, I seriously do not want to be caught in a traffic jam when it's happening.

We abort the mission, and drop in to the petrol station at the adjacent Tesco to refuel.

While I'm paying, I ask the woman at the pay desk what the palaver is.

"It's the IKEA sale," she says.

I roll my eyes and do one of those expressions.

"Funny," she said, "Everyone asks the same question and then does exactly the same as you when I tell them".


  1. Thanks for the warning about the IKEA sale - I wonder how long that lasts...

    I love your drawing those trees look they are driving rather well ;-)

  2. I have nothing from IKEA in my house. I have nothing from IKEA in my house...

    Are you listening?

    I have nothing. Honest.

    I too love the picture, and would quite like a copy of it (perhaps in the hallway). To save me the pain of copyright infringement, is there any chance of a nice repro? Or per?

  3. No idea, Caroline... but thanks for the comment.

    Thank you too, SB(are you an SB whom I know?) I grant you licence for a single copy for personal use, free of enfeoffment, entail, escheat and pannage -please feel free to download a copy from my Flickr page, unless you can't disentangle the technology in which case I can e-mail you a copy.

  4. Ahh, that's lovely, thank you.

    Yes, I am an SB what you know. Lovely blog, btw. A place of calm and good taste.